Yes, I’ve said it. And I mighty get some backlash. But being a mother can truly be a mother. You have the responsibility of keeping these precious little people alive while at the same time you need to teach them to be good humans! Its hard. Really hard. And it can outright break you. I love my babies with all I have but I would by lying if I never thought “WTF is going on?!”
If there is one thing I hate most about mothering, it would be the never-ending diaper changes. Its non-stop. ALL DAY. I swear my kids play jokes on me and wait for a fresh diaper in order to take a poo. There is nothing like changing a diaper and two minutes later doing it all over again. Not to mention trying to put a diaper back on while your child is wiggle worming all over the place and you are just trying to make sure they don’t fall off the changing table. Your fingers are constantly covered in diaper rash cream and if you’re one of the unlucky ones you have the joy of sticking your finger right in the poo!
Of course they warn you about the lack of sleep you will get but no one actually explains what it means to be sleep deprived. It is almost impossible to function and yet you still have to take care of the kids. I found myself walking into things and lacking focus. Dosing off at lunch and dinner became common and I would often wake up not knowing where I was or what year it was. Everyone tells you to sleep when the kids sleep but when you finally have the opportunity to go to sleep, you can’t unwind enough to actually fall asleep! It is a vicious cycle.
Feeding is the worst. There is literally food everywhere. Whether they are throwing it off the side or spitting it out of their mouth at me. Only the dog gets excited for feeding time because she knows Hailey will throw some food over the side for her. The bibs are useless. My kids always manage to find a way to get their food on everything but the bib. Or the best–when the food is on the bib and they pick it up and smash it in their face and hair. Plus, there is the constant gagging and choking. I’m on high alert at all times.
And another diaper change!
Now I have twins, so my experience with playtime might be a little different. But, there are toys EVERYWHERE. I attempt to clean but as soon as I do they have suddenly found an interest in the toys they haven’t touched in weeks! I’m constantly stepping on little blocks or dinosaurs and I might have rolled my ankle once or twice. It’s a constant battle of who wants what toy, who is pulling hair, and who is biting. And God forbid they don’t share and you hear the blood curdling scream. The tantrums are ever increasing and it is typical to throw your self to the floor or fling your head back in a fit of rage.
Oh yeah, and another diaper change.
But all of the tough, smelly, pukey, overwhelming, aggravating, stress-inducing moments are worth it!
Being a mother is by far the most rewarding role I have ever played. As my children move out of each diaper size it is a reminder of how much they have grown and how far they have come. In the middle of those sleepless nights, there are often quiet memorable moments of the little human you created and the bond you have established. While it may be exhausting, I try to remind myself that I shouldn’t take these moments for granted. Feeding time offers a ton of laughs as I get to see the reactions to new foods and praise the progress as the move from purees to large pieces. The most rewarding of all is playtime. There are moments when I can truly see the love between them and the bond they share. There is nothing more fulfilling than witnessing your children making each other smile and laugh. It is in those moments that I can sit back, sip my coffee, and tell myself I’m doing everything just right.
So yes, being a mother can be a mother. But I wouldn’t change it for the world.